Lately, I am having a problem concentrating. I am sure it is a byproduct of stress. I know I am a highly sensitive person and that makes it difficult to close my eyes to the frustration, pain and sorrow all around me. Throughout my life I have begged God to help me digest the truth about myself – I am in deed a sensitive soul.
These past few months have left me challenged by my own personhood, and I am known to be a person focused on whole-person and family health. I live and breathe health and wellness, yet lately I find I can’t focus for longer than a few minutes at a time. Anyone that knows me knows how much I love being on my deck meditating on the water. I am out there from March to late November sitting in my favorite chair that overlooks the Mohawk river. I am convinced my people traveled by canoe down this stretch of water generations back.
Lately every night between the hours of 7-8pm a beautiful rabbit sits in the middle of my yard and doesn’t move a muscle. I am fascinated by this rabbit’s ability to stay focused and grounded in this early evening ritual. I find myself asking why I can’t be still and focus like the rabbit. Is it because I know more frightening truths or carry the burdens of others? Is it because of all the uncertainty around me? Is it because I am walking in fear and caught up in projections about the future? But is the simple truth, I am not a rabbit, I am only human and doing the best I can?
These past few months have left its mark on me, but I am not too prideful to take a lesson from a rabbit and learn to be still and just be because after all, I am only human.